The Home Environment

The first five years of a child's life is very critical to the future intellectual growth and development. Once that stage is missed, an extra effort has to be put in for the child to catch up. Language development at this stage in life is easily accomplished. I have seen children from immigrant families who can speak more than two different languages including English within this early stages of life. Math is a language which has to be properly learned during this stage as well. I have seen kids below seven years who claim they hate math! What a shame? I do not blame them. It is the language which they have learned in their homes. Everybody hates math!

To me, the number one problem that I have discovered is the attitude of  parents towards education and the home environment. We know that children from homes where the parents or siblings have some form of education are at a greater advantage to succeed than those who are not. But even in some of these homes, the parents do not spend much time in ensuring that their kids do their homework well. Some parents virtually do the work for their kids instead of them providing the environment for them to actually struggle through and learn. They fear to see their children painstakingly do their homework. They would rather do the work than see the child spend several hours to explore concepts in math. They think the child's brain will explode. Sure, it will explore when they have difficulty in college doing the math that they should have know in earlier years! Parents have to change the the way they speak about certain subjects. The fact that you were bad at it does not mean you should instill the same fear into your child. If there is nothing good to say, just tell the child, "You can do, keep trying". There is no success without trials and failures. In failing, we learn endurance and new routes of escape so that the next time we encounter similar problems, we have immediate solutions.

The mistake we make is that, we teach our children that failure is a "sin". It is not ok to fail. You always have to succeed. Our children imbibe this concept and when they attempt a problem one or two times and they don't get the answer, they simply give up. They become hopeless. We forget that life is based on hope that one day we will success. We have to learn from Research and Development (R&D) in the industries and academic institutions. It takes many years of trial and error before success arrives. Sometimes, there is no success but many lessons are learned from the research to be used by other people. What may be terms as failure in one quarter is seen as a lesson to be applied in another area. We have to see failure in a positive light. As a stepping stone for success.

It may take hours for your child to get it right but once it is done, the concept learned will stay with the child forever because he/she did the exploration. Parents allow their kids to play several hours of video games or watch TV, thinking that they are doing their children a great favor. They will complain that homework is too long and their children don't have time for leisure. Why not schedule more time for your child to study basic math and English concepts. It will pay off one day. I am always intrigued when I go to a Chinese Fast Food restaurant and I see the children helping their parents take orders and then in between this, they sit down and do their home work, and extra work as well. As long as the parent is at work, the child has no other choice but to study. No wonder they are many in departments of math, science, engineering, etc. They know that "hard work does not break bones". Likewise, we have many people of Indian descent in the field of medicine because the parents are very strict when it comes to the academics. They see the potential and the children and they ensure that it is not misused.

Every child has the potential to succeed if the parent creates the right environment. An environment conducive to learning and intellectual stimulation. It does not matter your academic background, it takes resilience and right attitude to see your child succeed. Dr. Ben Carson, the great African-American neurosurgeon, did not have an educated mother, but her insistent that he put in hours of study and creating the environment and encouragement for him led to his success. He is now very beneficial to his society.
Parents, you can also do it! Don't be afraid to stretch the brains of your children a little bit further. It will pay of in future when they get scholarships into the Ivy League Schools.